“When you hold resentment towards another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” Catherine Ponder
We must take the time to understand that there is fruit in our forgiveness.
Have you ever had someone say or do something that hurt your feelings?
Is it just me or do we all replay what was said repeatedly?
Do you think about how you could have handled the situation or said something differently?
Do we say something that we would later regret?
We would not have to internalize the situation if we properly apologized and forgave for what we did or what was done.
Like you all, I never knew that there was fruit in forgiveness. I was always a grudge holder and too prideful to apologize.
I couldn’t communicate what hurt me nor did I have accountability for what I did wrong. It was like pulling teeth to get me to apologize.
Light as I took it I was blocking my own blessings. My blessings were looking to be feed the fruit of my selflessness and I repeatedly failed in the process.
I failed to go get my blessings.
As humans we are looking for junk to feed the pain and we all know the unhealthy results that come from junk. I call planting the seeds of forgiveness showing your work.
Do you recall being in math class and the teacher always wanting you to show your work?
No matter if your answer was right or wrong we had to show the work, or we failed the assignment.
Life is a teacher and when we aren’t showing the work, we repeat the same problems.
When we don’t heal from damaging situations or apologize for damaging someone, we encounter those same painful situations and our blessings are withheld.
Apologizing and forgiving is the fruit we need to keep our souls healthy.
We should accept the challenge of forgiveness, just as much as we defend our wrongs.
One day, I overheard a conversation between my five-year-old son and six-year-old niece. The conversation consisted of my five-year-old apologizing for whatever he had done the night before.
He adores his cousin and anything that can tarnish their relationship, he will apologize or forgive her for. I bring this incident up because it’s amazing how children can communicate their feelings, apologize faster and more efficiently than adults.
Children aren’t resentful. They are resilient, loving, humble and selfless. As adults we need to move towards mimicking their fruitful characteristics. They understand unity, trust, and love.
I always wondered what happened in our lives, that made us lose those humbling characteristics? Where can we find them, so that we may regain them?
We must know how to be humble! We must also choose our battles wisely.
We must apologize and focus on the better change, to receive our fruits of forgiveness. The healing of emotional pain , as well as the access to our blessings starts with apologizing and forgiving.
Guest Blogger: Carly Lankford
Carly Lankford is a poet, writer, and author of a new children’s book “Just Me and My Ears” set time be released in March 2020. With over a decade writing poems and short stories, Carly has a very unique voice that shines through in her upcoming projects about the importance of self-healing and childhood bullying.
Carly has completed numerous writing courses and Regent & Charleston Southern Universities. Carly has been a lifelong writer and began writing in published bodies of work in third grade.